by DavinJohnson | Aug 15, 2022 | Bright Days
There’s NO such thing as bad weather, only bad clothes: why winter play is so important for young children
It’s no secret that, at least in early childhood, our little ones inherit our attitudes about life, people, and the environment – and the same is true of seasons, like winter.
Whether it’s the proverbial ‘catching of a winter cold’, inevitable slips and falls on a frosty playground, or a ton of muddy laundry to do when all is said and done, too many parents and guardians see the chilly wet of winter weather as something for children to hide from.
Less to lose and more to gain
In time, growing children with winter-shy parents learn to dread the barren, monotone months of winter, cooped up inside with no respite. It seems like nature’s punishment.
Worse yet, cooped-up children might never realise what they’re missing, engrossed in iPads, films, and bought games, unaware of the possibilities of nature, and unwilling to conserve it.
On the other hand, when parents and guardians start to explore the myriad benefits of letting little ones engage in outdoor play in the wintertime, children grow up seeing winter as a wonderland, full of new possibilities, white magic, and fun! Doesn’t this feel like a better outlook?!
Provided parents check the weather in advance, and dress their winter munchkins accordingly (with raincoats, Wellingtons, scarves and mittens, and woolly socks to spare) there are so many benefits to reap from letting children play outdoors in the wintertime.
Let’s take a closer look.
“Don’t go outside or you’ll catch a cold!”
Face it, times change, and people learn. We now know, scientifically speaking, that colds and flu are the results of viruses, not damp clothes, frozen feet, or a chill in the air.
The viruses behind common colds and flu are readily transmitted in the stuffy, overheated, poorly ventilated indoor spaces during winter, not outside in the fresh air and cold weather!
So, by dressing your little one snuggly and sending them outdoors to get their muck on in the wind, rain, or snow, you’re not endangering them, you’re keeping them clear of the viruses that thrive indoors during cooler months.
Hands-on adventure
By letting your kids enjoy outdoor play in winter, you enable hands-on exploration of the lifecycles of plants and animals, and seasonal changes in the environment.
Not only does this teach valuable lessons about the recurring cycles of death and rebirth, hibernation, and re-emergence, but it also teaches children that even formidable winter has unique gifts to offer.
Any child who’s built an ice fortress, a snow angel, or a snow painting, made mud cakes, played puddle-scotch, or zipped along on a wet-grass toboggan knows that there’s fun to be had in winter that simply isn’t an option in summer, and vice versa.
The moral of this story: for those with a little courage and creativity, nature gives and gives and gives, and it takes away only to give back in abundance.
Tomorrow’s superheroes
Freedom of movement in outdoor play develops and strengthens the body’s large muscle groups, improving coordination, balance, and overall motor control. If children are forced to stay dormant during winter, their process of development is essentially interrupted.
Think about it. In winter, physical activity is extra demanding due to the challenges of slippery winter wet, resistant wind, and deep snow, not to mention the body’s constant effort to maintain its internal temperature against the biting cold.
Winter games outdoors give nature’s children the competitive edge, building hardy bodies and immune systems, fine-tuning balance and coordination, and boosting the body’s capacity to endure.
Practical Magic
Winter hones the physical and mental skills learned in the temperate months by piling on both a physical challenge and an element of calculated risk. Through trial and error, children learn that to run on slippery grass, you have to temper your speed and ready your arms in case of a fall.
Children who haven’t been allowed the first-hand experience of ‘learning the hard way’ have no means to hone this essential risk measurement and mitigation skill because it’s not a theoretical lesson, it’s a practical one.
The sense that they can engage their environment regardless of the weather, instead of feeling that they are at the mercy of it, is essential to their sense of self-confidence … not just in terms of weather, but in all aspects of life.
by DavinJohnson | Jun 28, 2022 | Bright Days
About Play-Dough:
Play-Doh™ is a childhood favourite that every kid loves! Play-Doh™ was originally created to serve as a wallpaper cleaner in the 1930s but took over as an educational toy two decades later. Play-Doh™ is a combination of flour, salt, and water so it is the perfect kids’ toy because it is non-toxic and reusable (although we don’t recommend eating it!).
Five benefits of Play-Dough
Although Play-Doh™ can be dumbed down to moulding clay into different shapes, it is far more extensive!
1. It develops fine motor skills
The acts of squishing, rolling, cutting, flattening, and more help build up strength in your child’s tiny hands. Your children develop muscles used in their hands for fine motor movements in the future, such as holding a pencil. As a bonus, your child’s hand-eye coordination enhances as Play-Doh forces them to manipulate the materials to fit their ideas.
2. It’s calming for children
Play-Doh™ acts very much like a squishy stress ball. Playing with the clay can help ease tension, release energy, improve focus, and more. For these reasons, Play-Doh™ is especially helpful for children on the spectrum or diagnosed with ADHD or ADD.
3. It encourages creativity
Play-Doh™ comes in so many colours and even textures that there are an unlimited number of creations your kids can make. Play-Doh™ encourages children to use their imagination and think in new and innovative ways.
4. It improves social skills
In a childcare setting, Play-Doh™ is a great practice for developing your child’s social skills. From sharing different colours and tools to collaborating on creations, children are encouraged to step out of their comfort zone, share, and be social with other kids. As a bonus, it promotes playtime – away from devices and electronics.
5. It supports literacy and numeracy
It can be difficult to get children interested in learning, particularly when they are learning to read or do maths. Play-Doh™ is an excellent tool to assist in teaching kids about counting, shapes, colours, and even descriptions!
As you can see, while Play-Doh™ often ends up dried out on the kitchen counter, its benefits are unbelievable.
How to make Play-Dough
Ingredients:
- 2x cup of flour
- 2x tbsp of oil (any kitchen oil will do e.g. coconut oil)
- ½ cup of salt
- 3x tbsp baking powder (optional)
- 1 ½ cup of boiling water
- Gel food colouring (optional – this is what gives Play-Doh™ its vibrant colour!)
Method:
- Combine flour, salt, and baking powder (if using) in a large mixing bowl.
- Add in oil and boiling water. Mix until they form the dough consistency.
- Sit on a bench and allow it to cool.
- Once cooled, add in food colouring (if using) and mix until combined.
HOT TIP: if you want to make several colours, separate the dough into even sections before you add any food colouring. Add one colour to each section.
- Knead the dough until it has been thoroughly mixed.
HOT TIP: this can be messy – if you don’t want to stain your hands, use gloves and cover your counter with glad wrap or a cover so you don’t stain your bench.
by DavinJohnson | May 5, 2022 | Bright Days
When to put your baby in childcare is a loaded question for any mum or dad, however, sometimes it’s a question that most new parents don’t even have the luxury of asking. The fact is, that maternity leave limitations, financial stress, postpartum anxiety, and exhaustion can all mean an early start to childcare is inevitable for your child.
Unfortunately, this loaded question has an equally loaded answer and, to be honest, the jury’s still out on the perfect age for starting daycare. Your child is a unique and precious gem, with unique developmental needs, quirks, and emotional attachments, which is part of what makes this question so difficult to answer.
So let’s begin, rather, with the worst age to put your child in daycare.
What is the worst age to start daycare?
While the exact worst age for daycare is still very much child-dependent, we can safely say that a too-late entry into daycare (kindy 3 to 4 years of age) could mean a much harder transition period for your child. The Queensland government offers a fully funded kindergarten program combined with low-cost long daycare so your child can start a quality kindergarten program much sooner.
An older toddler who’s accustomed to home time with mum and/or dad will feel the full weight of separation anxiety, coupled with the shock of a broken routine, plus a new set of faces, personalities, and social situations to navigate. If you’re trying to decide when to start your child in daycare, we’d say that sooner is better than later!
The good news is that the right daycare with the right educators (as well as a little know-how about how to settle your child into daycare) can go a long way, even if you need to enter your child into a three-year-old kindergarten program at the feisty age of 3-4 years.
Is 6-12 months too early to start your child in daycare?
Let’s face it, in 2022 and beyond, most families don’t have the financial means or option to choose a stay-at-home parenting approach and, even if they do, an early start to daycare still offers a host of impressive benefits that a baby just won’t have at home.
While the first 12 months of a baby’s life are essential to immune development, emotional bonding, and achieving milestones like crawling, walking, and talking, this doesn’t mean starting your child in daycare at 12, 6, or even 3 months is too early!
In fact, the diversity of new environments, new people, and even new bacteria will mean a healthier immune system for your child as they develop. Likewise, the stimulating environment of childcare, social interactions, bright scenery, and enriching activities will help your child to progress and reach those emotional, physical, social, and language milestones at an earlier age.
Last but not least, your daycare and the skilled carers who work there will be able to offer you valuable insight on whether your child is developing at a standard rate for their age group, or whether they are progressing too slowly or too fast!
All you need is the right daycare and a little preparation
As a parent, you want to feel that you’re doing the right thing for your child, we get it, you want to minimise separation anxiety and ensure a safe environment that offers warmth, stimulation, and room for real mental and motor development.
Choose the right daycare, with experienced and well-screened carers and teachers, a space that meets your safety expectations, and programs that offer opportunities for plenty of social and sensory engagement, plus loads of play-based educational fun!
After selecting the right daycare for your child, set them up for an easy transition into daycare by reading our article entitled ‘How to Settle Your New Child into Daycare.’
by DavinJohnson | May 4, 2022 | Bright Days
For parents, contemplating childcare for babies and children can be stressful. Separation anxiety is a force of nature but, more often than not, it’s the parents that feel this anxiety first … and anxiety is contagious!
Remember though, childcare is about more than just getting you back to work, it’s about welcoming your child into a healthy, safe environment where they can engage in early social development with carers and their peers.
How soon can I put my baby into daycare?
Whether you’re putting a baby into a childcare centre at 6 weeks or putting a child into childcare at 18 months, as long as your child has become interactive and responsive, a little preparation is all they need to be psychologically and emotionally ready for the transition into childcare.
The earlier you expose a child to the childcare development tool, the stronger and more independent they will become! Think of this as early training for big transitions and changes to routine later in life, and try to ease them into the process with, well…baby steps!
How to prepare your child for daycare?
For very young or anxious children, it’s important that you get them used to the idea of new faces and new settings, so consider a few visits to the daycare in advance. Allow your child to look over the unfamiliar scenery, and allow the caregivers to hold and interact with your baby, while you stay out of sight.
Three or four accompanied visits should be enough exposure to prepare your child for the childcare centre. Remember, your baby will pick up on your emotions, so stay calm and enjoy the experience. There may be a few tears but push through, allow the carers to work their magic, and don’t worry, you’re allowed to feel a little jealous when that carer first draws out a giggle!
If anything bothers you about the facility or the personnel, if you have safety concerns or simply don’t like what you see, either voice your concerns or move on! If the childcare centre is to your liking, ensure you get their list of rules and items to pack, daily schedule, emergency numbers, and more for when that big day comes.
The night before daycare
It’s important that you align your baby’s sleeping schedule with the schedule at the child care centre, ensuring your child is well-rested and rearing to go when that big day comes. For new babies, check and double-check that all their goodies are packed, with extra clothes just to be sure.
Pack your baby’s trusty blankey or plushy toy in so that they can hang onto a piece of home when they get anxious. You could even keep the item in your own bed the night before, to cover it in the familiar scent of a loving home.
The first day of childcare
Even with prior exposure, this parting may be a difficult one and it could take anywhere from 2 weeks to 6 months to settle your new child into daycare…but they will settle! The most important thing here is to help get your child engaged with some object, activity, or staff member as soon as you arrive on that first day of daycare.
Once your child is occupied, you need to wave, smile, reassure yourself and then hightail it out of there ASAP! The longer you linger, the longer it will take for the carer to settle your baby into daycare on that first day.
Remember, children learn through repetition, so establish a consistent routine for drop-offs and pickups, with distinctive wording and tone to help your little one recognise that this ‘goodbye’ means that you are leaving, but will be back later!
What about the guilt?
Many new parents feel overwhelmed with guilt on that first day but remember: this is not a betrayal of trust, and childcare is much more than just a convenience for you.
Childcare has a wealth of benefits for your child’s learning and development, as it is an important social and educational play-based environment that will equip your child for a bright future full of healthy social interactions.
by DavinJohnson | Apr 11, 2022 | Bright Days
As adults, we can’t help but feel that we’ve somehow lost touch with mother nature.
When last did you switch on the news or open YouTube without some reminder of climate change, drought, flood, fire, pollution, pandemic, and more?
How many of your friends and loved ones battle anxiety, depression, and mental health-related issues? Maybe even you?
Of course, these things are all connected.
As new parents, this is the last thing we want to hear, especially when we’ve just brought a bright-eyed baby into the world. The good news is that you can start to shape and protect your little ones for entry into this strange new world by introducing them to nature early on, as a part of their daily play routine.
1. D for Dirt
The past 50 years have seen a 50% decline in the amount of time that children spend soaking in the sunlight and getting down and dirty in the great outdoors. Yet, rugged play in a natural setting especially in a quality kindergarten program is not only a surefire way to stimulate and entertain little ones, but it also has very real and far-reaching health benefits.
In early childhood education, exposure to quality green environments that are rich in healthy dirt, insects, animals, plants (and yes…bacteria) is key to building strong immune systems and little bodies that are less prone to intolerances, allergies, and even phobias that create limitations and anxiety later on. Think of it as a daily dose of Vitamin-Dirt!
What’s more, old-fashioned vitamin D from sunshine is a vital part of a healthy lifestyle: strengthening growing bones and helping children ward off the nastier bugs and viruses that come their way. Real sunshine is so important that, in the age of global pandemics, pediatricians recommend vitamin D supplements for babies and small children who don’t spend enough time outdoors.
Invest in a fully-funded Victorian government kindergarten program at an early learning centre where play and investigation are encouraged and your child will gain vitamin D from sunshine. At Bright Days Early Education children are encouraged to learn about nature and be actively involved in our very own Bright Days Early Education community garden.
2. Risk is Relevant
Researchers tell us that, without unstructured playtime outdoors, we’re lowering creativity, ingenuity, and social confidence in children. The average parent or caregiver puts so much focus on technology, educational indoor play, over-scheduling, and over-protective ‘child-management’, that we actually risk doing lasting damage to our young ones.
Relax, we’re not saying you should leave your babies to fend for themselves in the wilderness. What we are saying is that for children aged 1 to 6, exploring the magic of nature and playing outdoors is exhilarating, engaging, and educational. It teaches our children how to assess and handle risks, something that simply can’t be learned any other way.
And, while rough and tumble, the nature-based play has clear benefits for physical stimulation, activity, flexibility, and expression, it also teaches your child to tackle real-world situations on their own. It teaches them to meet the challenges and the ‘great unknowns’ of life with a brave face and even a smile!
What should you do? Start safeguarding your child against anxiety, stress, ADHD, and more, by balancing structured indoor activities with sessions of freestyle outdoor adventure.
Feel free to supervise, however, stay at a distance and don’t interfere!
3. Embracing Diversity
The great outdoors (whether that be your backyard, a local park, or a local sanctuary) offers unpredictable, natural changes, challenges, and wonders.
For example:
- Why is it harder to run up the slope, but easier to roll down?
- What’s that noise? Ah, insects in the leaves!
- I wonder where the butterflies come from, and where they live?
- There are so many great and small creatures in the world, not just humans, dogs, and cats!
Exploring outdoors shows little ones their place in the world: it teaches self-awareness, social skills, and self-esteem. Enjoying nature with other children, in a range of weather conditions, with trees, rolling pathways, boulders, streams, fields, birds, and beasties, teach them to embrace life’s many diversities and tiny details, as well as its real and looming challenges (like the hill!).
4. Nature’s Champions
As a new mother or parent, this is your way of ensuring that, as your child grows to adulthood, they do so with a sense of respect and responsibility toward the natural landscape that nourishes them and those they love.
Besides your responsibility to protect, nurture and develop your child, outdoor excursions are a great way to give back to nature. That’s because, when you allow your child to value time spent playing outside, you’re inspiring tomorrow’s protectors and nurturers of nature and the environment.
We’re raising the movers and shakers of the future, so let’s get proactive and equip them with the tools and tricks they’re going to need to be healthy, happy adults…adults who remember (and preserve) the magic of nature!
Found this useful? Feel free to share with others and if you have any other suggestions or tips, please comment below.
by DavinJohnson | Mar 16, 2022 | Bright Days
Bonding is the attachment developed between parents and their babies. Studies reveal that this connection sets the stage for how the child enters healthy relationships and expresses emotions throughout life.
It’s not uncommon for fathers to feel left out due to mothers’ frequent nursing sessions with their babies. For this reason, here are some effective ways dads can establish a bond with their babies.
1. Singing to Baby
Many paediatricians recommend singing to your baby in utero and continuing with that familiar song once the baby is born. This action effectively calms the child and soothes their emotions.
Fathers can pick a special song or two and sing it frequently during pregnancy and continue with the routine once the baby is born. This assists the bonding process and solidifies the connection between father and child.
2. Cuddling
The benefits of holding your baby close to your chest are vast, as studies reveal it helps in temperature regulation, stress reduction, blood sugar stabilization, oxytocin release (the love hormone), a sense of security, and more.
Fathers should consider spending as much time as possible with their newborns. By cuddling the baby on the left side of your chest the baby will hear your heartbeat delivering a soothing calming experience.
3. Consistent Interaction
In the book “Your Amazing Newborn,” Dr. John Klaus and Phyllis Klaus stated that fathers should prioritize spending time with their newborns in the first three months after birth. It’s recommended, during this period, to maintain eye contact whenever the baby catches your eye, repeat their babble like a conversation, and even make funny noises.
Other activities you can do to consistently interact with your child include games like peekaboo, pat-a-cake, and this little piggy. These factors combine to intimately connect the father to the child and help establish the necessary developmental. bond.
4. Babywearing
Babywearing is an excellent opportunity for fathers to connect and bond with their babies. This factor is due to babies’ love to be worn, and when done correctly, it solidifies the connection between father and child.
Besides, wearing a baby makes it easier to accomplish daily tasks and chores around the house or even at work, depending on the father’s type of job. Nevertheless, it’s an effective way to bond with your child
5. Get involved in Feeding and Nappy Changes
Another effective way to connect with your child is during feeding sessions. Should a mother be breastfeeding a father can take the baby for burping. Additionally, should your baby be bottle-fed a father can take over the role and nourish the baby themselves.
The same applies to nappy changes; a father should take over some of the sessions and interact with their baby as they put on the fresh nappy. Fathers can spice up the process by making funny faces, singing to them, or anything of the sort to get a positive reaction from the baby.
Conclusion
Fathers are equally essential to the baby’s mental development and should create a substantial connection with the baby right from birth. We hope the tips in this blog give you some ideas to begin your journey in bonding with your child.
Found this useful? Feel free to share with others and if you have any other suggestions or tips, please comment below.
by DavinJohnson | Mar 7, 2022 | Bright Days
Finding the right childcare centre will stir up a whole range of guilty emotions. Unfortunately, as mothers, we really don’t want to leave our most precious person in the hands of strangers.
However, there are many positives for both yourself and your child as a great early childcare centre becomes the home away from home.
Picking the right childcare service will nurture and enhance the development and growth of your child through play and socialization with others.
A mother knows her child the best, so before you begin your search for the right childcare centre, ask yourself what you are wanting from a centre.
Is it someone to look after your child for a couple of hours or a centre that provides early education for your child? Once you understand what type of care best suits your needs, then it’s time to find the perfect daycare centre for you and your child.
Here we have the top 7 questions you should ask a childcare centre:
1. What is Your Approach to Discipline?
It is the most critical question to ask a daycare centre basically because you can tell a lot about a provider’s general philosophy by how they choose to discipline the children in their care. Ask specific questions like does the staff use a raised voice to reprimand children? Does their approach differ depending on the age? Are time-outs used, and if so, what does that look like? Are there punishments or consequences for bad behaviour? Every parent handles discipline differently though it’s important to know the general attitude of the daycare centre.
2. How Many Children Does A Caregiver Attend?
It is another must-ask question so you can rest assured that your provider has the resources required. A low ratio is good, as the caregiver can fully attend to each child’s physical and emotional needs of your child.
3. How Do You Group Children By Age?
The grouping of children by age is important as children of each age require different care. For example, the needs of a 5-month-old are very different compared to those of a 3-year-old. You have to make sure your child is treated among their age category.
4. What Is A Day’s Routine?
Knowing what your child does during the day is important. Is the daycare centre highly structured or does it operate on an all-day free play model with meal breaks. It doesn’t matter if your preference lies somewhere in between, it’s just great to get a sense of what exactly your child will doing each day.
5. Do You Provide Any Educational Curriculum?
Early education involves play-based learning it’s the sum total of all the interactions, experiences, activities, routines and events that happen in the early learning program environment from when a child arrives until they depart.
6. Are Meals and Snacks Provided?
Some daycare centres provide meals, while others do not. If you don’t have to pack lunch for your child remember that’s an extra 15 minutes of sleep! If food is offered, ask about what they serve so you can make arrangements if any of the food is off-limits for your child.
7. Are Children Required To Be Up-To-Date on Immunisations?
Remember sickness spreads like wildfire wherever there’s a group of kids, and babies who are not old enough to have received all their vaccinations are particularly vulnerable. Therefore you should absolutely ask about the daycare centre’s vaccination policy and what steps they take to enforce it.
Do your research by checking out a number of daycare centres before making your final decision. Go online and read the reviews, book a centre tour and speak with the director so that you can compare. Some may even let you have a trial or orientation to ensure you are completely satisfied.
Found this useful? Feel free to share with others and if you have any other suggestions or tips, please comment below.
by DavinJohnson | Sep 29, 2021 | Bright Days
Developmentally, a child will be ready to toilet train from between the ages of 18 months and three years… they’ll probably exhibit signs of readiness, which helps eliminate the guesswork.
What is the right age or best time to start toilet training?
A child needs to be between the ages of 18 months and three years before they have the necessary development to recognise the urge to go to the toilet.
But the best time to start toilet training is when your child shows signs that they are ready:
- When your child is able to tell you that they’re pooing or weeing while they’re doing it or can tell you straight after.
- If they can tell you before it happens, they are definitely ready for toilet
- Leaves the room or finds a quiet place to wee or poo in their nappy.
- They start taking their nappy off.
- Tries to sit on the toilet.
- Stays dry for at least 2 hours at a time, or after naps.
How do I encourage my child to use the potty or toilet?
- Give rewards to your child such as a sticker chart, a treat, or an activity they enjoy.
- Try to make toileting part of your child’s regular daily routine. For example, encourage your child to use the potty or toilet in the morning, and before or after snacks and meals.
- Encourage your child to go to the toilet when they show signs like wriggling around, passing wind, going quiet or moving away from you.
- Sing potty training songs.
- Give your child a doll to potty train.
- Read potty training books.
- Let your child wear underwear over their nappy for a while.
- Use pull-ups so that they can go to the toilet frequently throughout the day.
- Make it fun!
Should toilet training be started at Kindergarten or should it start at home first?
It’s good to start toilet training at home as a child generally feels more comfortable with their parents. However, they will often notice their peers using the toilet at Kindergarten and may follow their behaviour.
What if they have accidents?
- Praise every little success and remain calm about accidents.
- Assure them it is okay to have accidents. Be casual about accidents; take an “Oh well, it doesn’t matter” attitude.
What kind of books can we read to help children?
Books that have clear, big, and bright pictures with simple instructions and lots of positive reinforcement and encouragement.
How long does it take a child to toilet train?
Every child’s development is different, so each will take their own time. If you have any concerns about toilet training, seek more information from your doctor or paediatrician.
by DavinJohnson | Sep 29, 2021 | Bright Days
Think of a two year old having a tantrum as a runaway train: we don’t stand back and wait for them to crash; we step in to help them pull the handbrake.
At around two years old, children start developing new emotions. And they’re some of the big ones: anger, frustration, guilt, embarrassment – really heavy-duty feelings. They’re not notoriously known as the Terrible Twos for nothing.
As adults, we can have a tough enough time with these emotions ourselves, so imagine trying to process them as a two year old without enough vocabulary, life experience (let’s call it wisdom) and factual knowledge to make sense of them.
Believe it or not, the journey to self-regulation starts at that tender age of two. Self- regulation is the way in which we begin to understand and manage our feelings; it’s what helps us learn how to behave and get along with other people. And two year olds need a lot of help at this critical stage of their development.
We don’t send a child away because their emotions are too big, too disruptive, or too inconvenient… we support them through their meltdown.
Think of a child having a tantrum as a runaway train: we don’t stand back and wait for them to crash; we step in to help them pull the handbrake.
If you take one thing from this blog, it should be this: time outs are OUT for two year olds! At that age, children are too young to appreciate that a time out is a consequence.
What Master or Miss Two needs is a time in.
“Easy!” said no parent ever. So, how do we manage a time in to support a child in meltdown?
First off, remaining calm (or even pretending to be calm) is key. Even if we’re overwhelmed, we must remain the adult in the situation and understand that meeting a child’s tantrum with a grown up’s anger or distress is like putting a match to fireworks.
We place ourselves at the child’s physical level (whether they’re on the floor or up a tree!) We try putting a hand on their shoulder. We let them know we’re there with them and understand they are feeling really bad right now.
The most important thing at this point is the child becomes aware we are there; they are not left to manage this big feeling by themselves.
A hug or putting the child on your lap is very important. Hugs generate the hormone oxytocin which stimulates the “calming down” part of the nervous system. Hugs are the language that a two year old will best understand.
Often, a change of stimuli is helpful. A quiet room, a comfy bean bag, a cuddly toy, their blanket, or heading outside can provide a welcome sensory distraction for the child.
After the child has calmed down, help them talk about their feelings: “Did you feel angry when your truck broke? That must have felt bad.”
This is the opportunity for the child to better understand their emotions and gives them some words to express themselves. And, when we acknowledge how they feel, we model empathy and build trust.
Helping a two year old regulate their very big feelings can be a real test of our nerve, but will set them up for great self-esteem, mental and physical wellbeing, and successful relationships throughout their life!
